nico (dysrhythmic) wrote,

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I claim my right to whine

So thing one that I need right now, and I think "need" is fair, as opposed to "want," is a source of income, viz. employment. People say "like what?" and I say "anything," because I mean it. I'll take something horrible and thankless, because nothing ever comes up anyway, unless you've already got something on your plate. It's like how I all of a sudden become significantly more attractive when I'm in an exclusive relationship. (I'd just love to muse on that, but that's a whole different, longer, and much much wankier exercise in amateur psychology and what I understand to be dualistic analysis.)

Thing two that I need/want (it's a little more ambiguous here) is to get laid. On the one hand, I took a vow of chastity (so to speak -- I didn't make it with any kind of higher power, and it wasn't so dramatic as a VOW), but I'm wondering if it just might help to restore my objectivity a little bit, because I'm going a little crazy, here. Of course, wanting and facilitating are two different things, and the vow had more to do with stopping the want, because I'm not very good at the facilitating.

In other news, I need to start sleeping less. These ten-twelve hour nights are really making the dreams come back. And until I start dreaming about something interesting (sex dreams woooo!!!) I'd prefer not to dream of anything at all. Recently there was some REALLY long one, a large part of which consisted of me waiting for the train in this empty lot while this little eight-or-whatever-year-old kid chased me around with a revolver and threw lit M-80s at me. Every now and then the little bastard would flip one into my pocket somehow and I'd have to dig it out without blowing my fingers off. God I hate dreaming.
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